Anger is a completely normal response that we all experience. Something or someone hurts or embarrasses you, or makes you feel vulnerable or ashamed so your adrenaline kicks in, heart rate speeds up, and you want to control the damage immediately. If you are hot tempered and don’t know how to calm yourself down, this can send you uncontrollably off the deep end. You might respond by yelling and screaming, throwing things or even by becoming physically abusive. The angry feelings aren’t a bad thing; it’s the way you respond to those feelings that can become constructive or destructive in your everyday life. The reality is that you don’t need to continue to live like this. You can become more adept at controlling your anger by learning how to turn your anger into a positive and improving your social skills.
So, what’s the positive side of anger you might ask? First of all, your anger brings your feelings to the forefront reminding you how unhappy or unsatisfied you are. It then can give you the energy you need to shake things up. It can motivate you to make a change in your life by letting go of a toxic relationship or a frustrating job, lose weight or eat healthier, to change the status quo. In the bigger picture, famous people like Martin Luther King or Mother Theresa have used their anger to help change the world. Lastly, anger helps to protect you from harm. It triggers the fight or flight response to help you defend yourself to survive a challenge. You’ve been passed over for a promotion at work one too many times? Your angry emotions can push you to talk to your boss about how to move up in the company.
Many people think that they can deal with their angry emotions on their own and end up ignoring or repressing them. This often just delays the hostile reaction by days or years until you reach a boiling point and can’t hold it in anymore. Or, they have a detrimental outburst and then move on, losing respect from those around them and even leaving them afraid. A better solution is to learn to deal with your anger related issues to respond in a more constructive way.
When you learn the necessary skills to handle your anger, you will learn how to resolve conflict by expressing your anger in a calm and respectful way so that the person on the receiving end doesn’t feel completely attacked. Then a positive discussion can take place in which a misunderstanding is worked out to the benefit of both parties involved.
Anger management classes both online or in a group setting give people a safe and non-judgmental setting to provide the support and techniques necessary to improve the relationships in your life, improve your experience at work and even prevent your anger from turning into a violent reaction. This is done by learning how to understand your own personality traits and trigger points. Then through learning how to better manage your stress, improve your emotional intelligence and techniques to talk yourself into a calmer state, you can ultimately tame your angry reactions and get your life on track.